A Typical or Atypical Pastor's Wife-whichever one you come to believe

Welcome to the barnyard. Watch your step! The things written here are raw and unedited. Just my thoughts thrown on a page as they flow from my heart.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

What You've Missed

I truly am taking a break from blogging.  However, since my blog is a kind of electronic journal that my family also reads, I may throw some things on it from time to time.  Since the time of my last posting, life has continued barrelling down the road like a Nascar driver on the autobahn.   Here are some of the things you missed:

~The microwave exploded.~
There were buzzing sounds accompanied by bright flashes of white light pulsating from the kitchen.  My boys stood mesmerized,  as if frozen in time.  One had eyes as big as the rotating plate in the oven and the other was saying "Cooooooool!"  It reminded me of a scene from a low budget sci-fi movie.  Soon my husband and son-in-law stood by watching as well until my voice of reason screamed into their alternate universe "turn it off and unplug it!"  Meanwhile, I was sure I saw radioactive particles floating through the air and settling on their heads.  That would explain their behavior lately.

~A bladder infection. ~
 Needless to say, things were not running very smoothly around here for awhile.  Who knew a faulty bladder could cause me to miss more consecutive Sunday services than any other event since I started attending church 27 years ago. 

~An appt. with the gynecologist--
set up by my general practitioner--against my will--as punishment for not having an exam since the birth of my youngest child.  That might not sound so bad except for the fact that my youngest child is a freshman in high school.  As a result of this appt. you also missed....

~Several sonograms,
none of which succeeded in finding one of my body parts. I'm pretty sure it's still in there.  If I had lost it, I probably would have noticed.  I asked the technician if she could find the expiration date on my ovaries just cause it would be nice to know when I'm going to hit the big "M", but she couldn't find it.

Speaking of the big "M", I had my first mammogram
which left me feeling a little pinned in and hard pressed to understand what all the fuss is about mammograms!  My friends had convinced me that I would nearly die in the process.  I had even practiced inflicting pain in that area through the week in an effort to prepare.  When I asked the technician when she was going to inflict the life threatening pain, she looked puzzled and said "I'm done!" 

~My daughter took her first test in public school without the aid of a para-professional. 
By law, learning support students are allowed extra time, but she didn't need it.  She was allowed to use her notes, but she chose not to. (Yes, I talked to her about that!).  She got a 72%.  A 72% might not sound like anything to shout about, but take my word for it, IT IS!  WHOPPPEEEEE!

~My oldest daughter's wedding. 
 She was beautiful.  The day was almost magical, except that I don't believe in magic.  I do believe that it was a very spiritual day, a God honoring day, and a milestone for many, my husband and I included.  After the wedding, we just laid on our bed in each other's arms and cried.  We're not sure what that was all about.  Maybe exhaustion, maybe joy, maybe sensing that for the very first time in her short existence, the responsibility for her welfare has shifted off us and on to her new husband (whom we absolutely adore!), or maybe we were just mourning for our checkbook which now needs CPR.

~Our continuing battle to keep eye glasses on two of our children. 
Somehow they both managed to break their frames in an unrepairable fashion within an hour of each other.  And because we're in the ministry, it happened on Sunday morning right before church.  Is there any other time?  To make matters worse, the frame store is not open on Mondays which is the day of the week that I always need them the most.  I almost considered switching to Wal-Mart's eye care store but.....
~considering that my current store guarantees frames for two years instead of one
~considering that my insurance will help pay for new frames every two years
~considering that I have replaced so many lenses in the last 3 months that they feel sorry for me so they only charge me $10.00 per lens
~considering that they don't laugh or roll their eyeballs every time I walk in the front door, I have decided to stick with them.  Getting new frames for free is just the icing on the cake.

Speaking of cake, you also missed my youngest daughter's 17th birthday!  I almost missed it too!  (Note to self: Request that Franklin Covey put digital alarms in every day planner so that those of us who own them will remember to look at them at least once a week!)  The date on the sonogram screen reminded me.  It was because of her that I had endured these kinds of tests before.  (Both types of sonograms, by the way.  Anyone whose had them will now say "Ewwww!" and "poor you!".  The rest of you are better off remaining clueless!  Just pray it never happens to you!)   So I guess I should be happy that I had the sonograms because my daughter would not have been happy if I had forgotten that it was her birthday. 

More info is forthcoming. 
About the birthday. 
Not about the sonograms. 

It's funny what will jolt your memory.

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