A Typical or Atypical Pastor's Wife-whichever one you come to believe

Welcome to the barnyard. Watch your step! The things written here are raw and unedited. Just my thoughts thrown on a page as they flow from my heart.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Ahhh....The Sounds of Christmas

"It's beginning to sound a lot like Christmas, every where I go.."

Woman at WalMart: "alright then, I'll just pay up front!" She just couldn't understand why the men in automotive couldn't weigh her broccoli! HA! Get a life lady! You could have had to drive several different places to purchase clothes, food and get your car worked on! Sheeeeesh!

Man at Sams to the poor cashier that doesn't have a clue: How can you take my ID and scan it? That's invasion of privacy! There's personal information in that magnetic strip!!! You shouldn't be asking me for that!!!!!! How can you do that? You can't do that!!! Why did you do that????

Man at Michaels buying a hedgehog Christmas ornament carved from a log: (Yes, that should conjure up many pictures in your brain!) "I think I'll start a new tradition with this". (personally, I was dying to ask him what in the world it would be but refrained. At least he was making an effort!)
The Sounds of Christmas at my House:
"whisper, whisper, whisper, whisper"
"Stay out of my room!"
"Close the door!"
"Don't come in here!"
"You're working on getting coal for Christmas, aren't you?"
"I took "your" sons shopping today, and they made me so mad I just wanted to crack their heads together!"
"Move! I need to get those cookies out of the oven, NOW!"
"Don't spoil your dinner! Save some cookies for Christmas, please!"
"Who ate all the peanut brittle......AGAIN!"
"I like that you baked all those cookies Mom. That way we always have something to eat!"
"Boys, come put the lid on the cookie container the RIGHT way!"
"Were you born in a barn like Jesus? Shut the door!"
"Sorry, I'm all done shopping for you. Save it for your birthday wish list."
"Do I look like I'm made of money?"
"It's a good thing we don't believe in Santa because if we did, you two would get absolutely nothing for Christmas! But since Jesus came to give us a gift we didn't deserve, I guess you'll still find something under the tree this year!"
"Don't look at what the UPS driver brought! I'll get it!"
"You've got to be kidding me!" (said to the postmaster when she told me that it would cost me three times more than what I spent purchasing my sister's gift to mail it to her in Oregon! Next year she's getting a recipe in the mail instead of the finished product and no, it wasn't fruit cake!)
"I AM NOT shoveling snow on Christmas day! That is where I draw the line!"
"Did anyone water the tree?"
"WHO watered the tree? You got water all over the floor!"
"Don't run the train..........too fast! Oh no, get a fire extinguisher!"
"Mom, can I have a new Bible for Christmas? Mine is broke!"
"How come the neighbor sent us a card? They don't like us the rest of the year."

1 comment:

  1. This probably was extra hilarious to me because I've either heard y'all saying these things or I can just IMAGINE it!!! sooo funny!! Thanks for the smiles! :)