A Typical or Atypical Pastor's Wife-whichever one you come to believe

Welcome to the barnyard. Watch your step! The things written here are raw and unedited. Just my thoughts thrown on a page as they flow from my heart.

Monday, June 9, 2008

What Boys Do in the Bathroom

The Men's Room is not a place familiar to me. Oh, I've been in a few, but only because I didn't read the signs correctly and ended up walking into a line of bare bottoms facing a wall, which was my first clue that I was on forbidden ground! However, I saw enough to dread the day when my two boys matured enough to balk at going into the ladies room with Mom.

Well, my day came. We were at a local restaurant and my boys, who are 14 months apart, had "to go". So after making it very clear that they were to follow the rules of pottying without Mommy--
1. go in together, come out together
2. flush, wash and dry your hands
3. if someone bothers you, yell "FIRE" as loud and as long as you can until someone rescues you
4. if someone grabs a hold of you, kick, scream, bite, scratch, do whatever you have to do in order to get away
5. NO extra flushing of paper, clothing or pocket contents.

"Are you sure you want to go by yourselves?", I asked. --I let them go.

I kept my eye on the hallway, noticing men going in and coming out. After about 10 minutes, my boys were still no where to be found, so I went and stood outside the bathroom door, just in case. Still no boys!

Well, little did I know that the restaurant had just installed automatic faucets and towel holders, and my boys were enthralled by them, so instead of coming out when they had finished they were joyfully being helpful by turning the faucets on for everyone and helping them work the towel holders.

After 15 minutes, and seeing people go in AND come out, and still no boys of mine, I began to get really nervous. I completely forgot where I was and walked up to the door of the men's room in a public restaurant, knocked loudly on the door and yelled, "boys, what are you doing in there?"Ever so slowly and carefully the door opened and out peeked a balding, middle aged man who asked, "do you really want to know?"

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